Thursday, October 13, 2011

BitterSweet

I discovered something today...having a baby in the NICU does not excuse, exclude, or keep you from extreme psychosis when driving through Utah County. HOLY COW...that traffic is enough to pull all my eyelashes and eyebrows out! I feel sorry for many of you that have to make that trip on a daily basis. I do have to say that the trip through Utah County was SO WORTH IT. I had the best, and bittersweet day I have had in a long time.

I made the trip into Utah County to visit my sisters. Kim & Sara were both having their babies at the same hospital...within two days of each other! How fun would that be to have a baby in the hospital with your sister in the next room with her new baby too? I was due 2-3 weeks after both of my sisters, so with them delivering their babies...it made me feel closer to the time that I might be able to bring Charly home. It's funny how I now interpret time by my NICU life.

Kim delivered a sweet little boy named Bentley.

Sara had the biggest of all of our babies with Lincoln.

Both of them seem so HUGE compared to Charly.

They are all so adorable!

I felt so grateful and happy that both of their babies were born healthy and happy. I really tried to keep my focus and the attention on them and their babies...but everywhere I looked, everything I saw and felt reminded me that my baby was in the NICU. I wondered what my sisters were thinking about me being there. I wondered if they felt secretly happy or guilty that their sweet babies were perfectly healthy. I wondered if they really had time to think of anything anyway...because becoming a new mommy is a sort of shock to the system. I really had a wonderful time being with my mom, my sisters, Val & EB. It was a day that I won't ever forget.

I was so overcome with happiness for my sisters and sadness for my sweet Charly at the same time. Doesn't make much sense does it? I cried all the way home.

1 comment:

  1. Ana-Christine was overwhelmed when she brought her last one home from the hospital. She does remember that feeling of being happy for others but...it is a feeling only those who leave their babies behind understand. Glad to see that Charly is doing so well and growing so fast.

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